Chapter 451 The Most Delicious Morning Court in History! [Seeking Monthly Votes]

"Brother Shi, are you planning to assassinate the emperor?"

Shi En grabbed the wine bottle and filled it for Shi Qian, and asked tentatively.

If they really wanted to assassinate the emperor, the Fengming Restaurant in the capital would have to change its business strategy, and the focus of its intelligence work would have to be on the princes.

If you act in advance, you might be able to plant a few nails around the future new emperor.

Shi Qian waved his hand and said:

"It's just a matter of putting some laxatives in the courtiers' refreshments, and then leaving some clues to point directly at the envoys from the Liao, Xixia and other foreign countries to see what choices the courtiers will make."

If the Emperor of the Han Dynasty is teased by Fan Bang, regardless of whether it is true or false, he must first destroy Fan Bang.

If the emperor of the Tang Dynasty was teased by Fan Bang, at the palace banquet at the end of the year, everyone would see the leader of Fan Bang taking the initiative to dance, and even express his love for dancing and ask to stay in Chang'an to pursue art.

But when the emperor of the Song Dynasty was teased... no one could really guess how they would react.

So Shi Qian wanted to give it a try to see if Huizong would show any new limits.

When the capital becomes chaotic, he will take the opportunity to do something else. The more chaotic Tokyo is, the easier it will be for him to gather information. If possible, Shi Qian even wants to leave some calligraphy treasures in the tunnel where Huizong secretly met Li Shishi. .

As a travel expert, it makes sense to check in at popular tourist attractions, right?

If you have time, you can also draw some paintings in the tunnel of the Zhao family bullying the orphans and widowers of the Chai family. Although it is not as high as Zhao Ji's artistic level, the concept of our painting is extraordinary.

Zhao Ji burst into tears after seeing this?

Lehe reminded:

"After all, he is Mr. Zhang's father-in-law, so don't go too far."

Zhang Fei was destined to defeat his father-in-law. In the original work of "The Romance of the Three Kingdoms", Xiahou's father, Xia Houyuan, fought with Ji Han for decades, and was eventually killed by the veteran Huang Zhong on the spot.

This defeat completely disrupted Cao Cao's plans. He was very disappointed with Xia Houyuan, whom he had always relied on, and even called Xia Houyuan "General Baidi".

After Xiahou Yuan's death, Zhang Fei's wife Xiahou made a special trip to Dingjun Mountain to bury her father and pay homage to him.

Xiahou Yuan's second son, Xiahou Ba, heard the bad news and worked hard to practice martial arts and the art of war. He vowed to avenge his father and became Jiang Wei's number one enemy for a time.

However, in 249, thirty years after Xiahou Yuan's death, the Sima family launched the Gaopingling coup, transferring Xiahou Xuan, who was in charge of the Guanzhong war, and replaced him with Guo Huai, who had always been at odds with Xiahou Ba.

Xiahou Ba guessed that the Sima family would eradicate the Cao family's clan power, so he took the initiative to defect to Xishu, where he had fought for half his life.

Liu Chan received him warmly, saying that the battle at Dingjun Mountain thirty years ago was a national war, not a personal feud. He also pointed to his own child and said that this is Xiahou's nephew.

From then on, Xiahou Ba returned to Western Shu and was named a general of chariots and cavalry. He was the second-ranking figure in the army after Jiang Wei.

The reason why Liu Chan was given such a high position was, firstly, to show the people in Wei State, and secondly, because Xiahou Ba had real abilities.

As soon as he surrendered to Western Shu, he said that the Sima family needed to quell the domestic unrest and could not care about external conquests for the time being. There was only a man named Zhong Hui. Although he was young, if he managed the government, he would be a worry for Wu and Shu.

In the end, his words were indeed verified. Zhong Hui led troops to attack Western Shu, and his general Deng Ai crossed Yinping. Zhuge Liang's son Zhuge Zhan died in the battle, Liu Chan surrendered, and Western Shu was destroyed.

However, Jiang Wei was unwilling to fail. At the expense of his family's lives, he instigated Zhong Hui to rebel and almost succeeded in restoring his country.

If someone hadn't found the secret letter of only 23 words from Liu Chan's belongings eighty years later, perhaps Jiang Wei would only have a reputation in history for being overly ambitious, militaristic, and overestimating his own capabilities.

But with that letter, Jiang Wei's image has caught up with his mentor Zhuge Liang.

If Liu Bei, as a descendant of the Liu family, gave the Han Dynasty a decent ending, then Jiang Wei was the one who brought the Han Dynasty to a successful end in Western Shu.

Although those idealists with a very romantic spirit have long since disappeared in the long river of history, their legends have been passed down from generation to generation for thousands of years. The soul-stirring spirit of heroism has also been inherited by the Chinese nation. , never forgotten.

Shi Jin took the wine bowl and drank it all in one gulp:

"Last time Mr. Zhang said that in the real world without an ID card, he couldn't take a car, otherwise he would go to Tianshui Jiang Wei's tomb to pay homage. He put the final touches on Ji Han, so he deserves to pay homage."

Shi En took a piece of dried tofu that had been simmered in stewed soup for several hours and put it into his mouth:

"Master Zhang is considered Jiang Wei's senior, what is a more appropriate memorial to him?"

Lehe said with a smile:

"The high-speed rail ticket from Chengdu to Xi'an... Dalang, is that word called high-speed rail? It is said that it can travel thousands of miles in one hour. I can't even imagine it."

Jiang Wei's nine Northern Expeditions were ultimately unsuccessful and he was unable to reach Chang'an in any of them.

Now using high-speed rail tickets to worship, Jiang Weiquan knows that he can definitely rest in peace.

Shi Jin asked:

"Tell me, if I worship other figures from the Three Kingdoms, what should I use as an offering?"

Shi Qian took out a pair of Three Kingdoms killing cards from his arms and turned them over for Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao:

"We used these sisters to worship Emperor Wu of Wei. I heard that Duke Cao was still talking about them before he died. I don't know if it's true or not."

"What about worshiping Sun Quan?"

Shi Qian turned over the Three Kingdoms Kill cards for a long time and found Zhang Liao:

"Use Zhang Liao or the high-speed rail ticket to Hefei."

"Aren't you afraid that Sun Zhongmou will crawl out of the grave and strangle you to death?"

A few people chatted and laughed until midnight, and then began to discuss the list of gifts.

Shi Qian did not participate in their discussion. He quietly slipped out of the restaurant and followed the curfew on Tokyo Street to the post station area where the Honglu Temple was located, which was what later generations called the embassy area.

He wore a nightgown and black gloves, and was as light as a swallow. He quickly climbed into the courtyard where the Xixia envoy lived.

According to the information provided by Zhang San and Li Si, the new Xixia envoy liked to eat at Fengming Restaurant, and every time he ate, he specially brought a curly-haired lion dog he raised.

The dog liked to eat the braised chicken heads in the restaurant, and he would eat three or four every time.

In order to make the lion dog look more noble and to discredit the Song Dynasty, the envoy also used gold powder to dye the dog's hair golden.

Shi Qian quietly pushed open a room, took out two braised chicken heads from his arms, and sucked them gently in his mouth. Soon, a well-behaved dog ran over and lowered his head to eat the chicken heads.

"Damn, you are such a silly dog!"

Shi Qian raised his hand and stroked the puppy a few times, pulling a few hairs. After the puppy finished eating, he went to the bedroom again and found a piece of clothing that the Xixia envoy had just taken off today.

Then he said "hush" to the little lion dog and left the Xixia Inn.

Shi Qian brought the clothes to the gate of the palace, quietly climbed in, found the office of Huizong, shone a small flashlight around, and found a map hanging on the screen next to it.

There are Xixia, Liao, and small countries such as Dali in the south.

It is basically a map of the current situation of the Song Dynasty. Although it is very simple, each country is marked.

Shi Qian looked around, ground some ink for himself, raised his hand and added a "Shang" in the middle of the name of Xixia, still using Xixia characters.

Although there is only one word difference between Xixia and Xixia Shangguo, if it were in the Han and Tang dynasties, it would definitely set off a war of annihilation.

Then he put on the clothes of the Xixia envoy, pretended to accidentally drop a few drops of ink, and then pretended to accidentally hang on the nail next to him.

"Swish..."

A small piece of fabric was torn off the clothes.

After leaving the study, Shi Qian touched the place where the imperial meals were made and found the pastry bureau that specialized in making pastries.

Inside were various pastries and biscuits prepared for the ministers tomorrow morning, and there were also more than ten kinds of tea, which the ministers could choose at will.

Shi Qian took out a small spray bottle from his backpack, mixed a little water with the strong laxative, and then gently sprayed it on the pastries.

There were still a few hours before the morning court, and the medicine sprayed on the surface of the pastries would penetrate thoroughly.

As long as the ministers tasted it, there would definitely be problems.

After spraying the medicine, Shi Qian carefully sandwiched the collected dog hair in the pastries.

This thing is light and cannot be placed on the surface of the snacks, which is easy to be seen. It has to be sandwiched in the middle, so that the ministers can inadvertently find the dog hair and then feel the pleasure of letting out a burst of fluid.

This may be the most interesting morning court in the history of the Song Dynasty... After Shi Qian finished all this, he left the palace, sent the clothes to the Xixia Posthouse again, and hung them in the envoy's room.

Then he quietly took out the powerful sleeping pills unique to the Water Margin world - the Menghan medicine, mixed it with water, and fed it to the envoy's mouth.

The dosage of the medicine is large, enough that the court will not wake up when investigating the case.

When leaving, the little lion dog ran over again and rubbed Shi Qian's trouser legs with his head.

"Good dog, stay here honestly, I will pick you up tomorrow."

Shi Qian did not have the habit of raising dogs, but thinking that the dog would be killed if it stayed here tomorrow, he unconsciously moved his sympathy.

He planned to quietly take the puppy away and raise it as a pet after the Xixia envoy was convicted of the crime.

After leaving the Xixia Posthouse, Shi Qian found an inn and slept in an empty room. When he woke up, it was just dawn. Someone was sweeping the street. The court officials in sedan chairs went straight to the gate of the palace, ready to go to court.

Today was a grand court meeting held every few days. Xixia proposed to increase the annual tribute. Huizong decided to call the court officials to discuss and ask for everyone's opinions.

At the gate of the palace, sedan chairs were parked outside, and the court officials greeted each other.

There were not many grand court meetings, and many officials took this opportunity to greet each other and communicate with officials they were familiar with.

Although whether to increase the annual tribute was a topic of discussion in the court, in fact, before the formal discussion, the officials of Cai Jing's faction had basically unified their views:

Agree to increase!

The so-called annual tribute is to give Xixia some money every year in exchange for peace.

This strategy was very effective for the Liao Dynasty. After the two countries signed the Chanyuan Alliance, they ushered in a century-long period of peace. There was no need to station troops at the border, and the people did not have to endure the suffering of war.

But Xixia, this fickle villain, although collecting tribute every year, can find different reasons to provoke and attack every year.

If they can beat them, they will take a big bite, and if they can't beat them, they will ask the Song Dynasty to stick to the contract.

Of course, with the continuous "efforts" of the court officials, the Song Dynasty won less and less times, and even killing some of the other side's scouts was called a great victory.

When the time came, the palace gate opened, and the court officials walked in one by one, and came to the room next to the main hall, ready to drink tea and eat snacks.

The court meeting lasted a long time, so even if the court officials did not eat in the palace in the morning, they would pinch two pieces of crispy cakes and eat a few bites with hot tea, so as not to be too long to hold on until the end of the court.

There were also court officials who looked down on the snacks provided by the palace and ate what they brought with them.

For example, the sesame crispy cakes, honey three knives, and glutinous rice strips from Fengming Restaurant were all favorites of the court officials.

After eating two pieces of cake and a cup of hot tea, my stomach is warm and I can last until noon.

When Gao Qiu came in, everyone had already started to dress up and clean the crumbs from their beards.

Since Gao Yanei disappeared, although Gao Qiu claimed to have died of a sudden illness, he still secretly searched for him for a while. After there was no news at all, he adopted a son from his hometown.

Compared with Gao Yanei, who bullied men and women and was lawless, Gao Qiu was very strict with his son. Not only was he strictly forbidden to go out, but he also hired people to teach him various etiquette, for fear of repeating Gao Yanei's old path.

Hearing several courtiers talking about his son being difficult to discipline, Gao Qiu also came over to talk about parenting.

Although everyone was flattering on the surface, they were murmuring in their hearts:

"Our son is a son. Wouldn't it be more appropriate to call your son brother?"

He adopts his cousin as his son, and adopts two children in succession. Is Captain Gao infatuated with this feeling of usurping the elder?

While they were chatting, Cai Jing, the Grand Master of the day, walked in tremblingly.

When the courtiers saw this, they quickly saluted and said hello. Even Gao Qiu, Yang Jian and Tong Guan also saluted respectfully, which showed the reputation of the traitor.

Cai Jing naturally won't eat the shortbread here, and even only drinks his own tea.

Seeing that everyone was ready, he waved his hand to the Huangmen eunuch, and the sound of going to court began to float in the palace.

Soon, everyone came to the main hall in order, and after paying tribute to Huizong Zhao Ji, they began to discuss increasing the number of Xixia coins.

Just as he was talking, several people who had eaten shortbread felt their stomachs growling and had the urge to have diarrhea.

But it's okay at the moment and bearable.

However, as the issue deepened, the discussion among the courtiers on whether to increase the annual coins became more and more intense. Even when both sides were insisting on attacking each other, a "pop" sound suddenly came from the main hall.

A strong stench wafted from the body of a fourth-rank minister in the Ministry of Rites.

The surrounding courtiers quickly covered their noses, but it was too late. Several officials whose faces turned the color of pig liver could no longer bear it. The sound of "puff, puff, puff" could not be heard, and the whole court was smelly.

Zhao Ji frowned:

"How could you be so rude!"

"Your Majesty, after I ate the palace cakes, I suddenly suffered from unbearable abdominal pain..."

Being able to become an important minister in the imperial court, everyone is not stupid. They soon realized that there was something wrong with the shortbread this morning. Cai Jing immediately ordered the people from the Ministry of Punishment to intervene. He first imprisoned the people from the Dim Sum Bureau, and then sent out capable officers to investigate the matter.

Half of the courtiers had their pants down, and they couldn't open their trousers in the morning. Zhao Ji waved his hand distractedly:

"No matter who it is, we will investigate thoroughly!"

After saying that, he took the lead to leave the smelly hall and prepared to go to the study to calm down. But as soon as he entered, he saw someone writing and writing.

His favorite white jade brush inlaid with gold thread, which he usually treasured so much, was actually dipped in ink and pressed hard on the table.

The pen tip, which was originally very elastic, was now completely split and was fixed by the dried ink.

As a master of calligraphy and painting, Zhao Ji knew very well that his favorite brush was useless!

Before coming, Shi Qian specifically asked Wen Huanzhang for advice on how to anger a master of calligraphy and painting.

Wen Huanzhang didn't know that this guy wanted to irritate Zhao Ji, so he specially taught him a damaging move, using the most rude way to treat the brush. This kind of degrading and gentle way was unbearable even for a master of calligraphy and painting.

Now that Shi Qian had really done it, Zhao Ji was not only deeply stimulated, but even almost went crazy.

Soon, Cai Jing was called in. Lao Cai, who was also a master of calligraphy, was also very excited when he saw the appearance of the brush.

Normally, he would get angry if the pens in his study were not washed in time after use, but now not only were they not washed, but they were also destroyed. No cultural person could stand it!

"Your Majesty, please calm down. I will send someone to investigate immediately!"

Just as he was talking, there were results from the Dim Sum Bureau, and a master from the Criminal Department walked in holding a few dog hairs:

"Your Majesty, the person who poisoned me has left many clues."

Taiwei Su Yuanjing, who came over to join in the fun, glanced at him:

"The dog's hair is dyed with gold powder... Isn't this the dog raised by the Xixia envoy?"

Could it be that the Xixia envoy did this?

Several people subconsciously turned their faces and looked at the map of Xixia on the screen, and then saw that the name of Xixia Kingdom had been changed to Xixia Shangguo.

Zhao Ji was furious:

"Let the Xixia envoy get out of the palace!"

The crime-solving experts sent by the Ministry of Justice investigated around and found the cloth torn off by nails. After identification by Su Yuanjing and others, it was the same color as the clothes worn by the Xixia envoy yesterday, and there was no difference in the pattern.

At this time, Zhao Ji did not let the Xixia envoy come in, but asked people to go to the Xixia Posthouse to capture him.

Just when everyone thought His Majesty was about to take action, Cai Jing advised:

"Your Majesty, pay attention to the dragon body. Although all the evidence points to the Xixia envoy, it still needs to be investigated and judged. We, the Song Dynasty, are the superior country, and we must be tolerant of everything..."

Two days ago, he accepted the benefits sent by the Xixia people and agreed to the Xixia envoy's request for an increase in annual coins.

Now that the situation has been laid, unexpectedly something like this will happen.

Zhao Ji waved his hand:

"Catch the person first and then talk!"

Da Honglu, who was in charge of diplomacy, brought several important ministers from the Ministry of Justice and Yushitai to the Xixia Posthouse aggressively. He learned that the Xixia envoy had not gotten up yet, which strengthened the possibility that he had committed the crime.

He must have committed the crime secretly last night and stayed up all night, which is why he hasn't gotten up yet today.

Everyone broke into the room and found him sleeping soundly.

Several people from the Ministry of Justice took the clothes and looked at them. There were places where nails were broken and there was a drop of ink. When you get close, you can smell the smell of tribute ink... It is the ink from the imperial study.

Now, the evidence is conclusive. Several people from the Ministry of Justice took out shackles and prepared to arrest people.

The court has made such a big embarrassment. If they don't arrest and sentence them severely, it will not be enough to appease the public anger.

However, just when everyone was about to take action, Cai Jing sent a message:

"The envoy represents the face of a country. No matter when, we must show enough respect. We are the Celestial Empire and should be generous."

The visitor continued:

"This case is of great importance. The Grand Master asked the Privy Council to take over. I hope all colleagues can cooperate."

At the same time, in the Privy Council.

The Deputy Privy Councilor had a warm smile on his face and said to a burly officer with a "face like a pot bottom, nose up, curly hair and red beard, and a sturdy figure":

"Xuan Zan, this case is your opportunity. Once you catch it, the Prime Minister will definitely look at you differently!"