Chapter 331

Xiaotian didn't want to answer at first.

But she didn't want Ning Youguang to think she was a fool who didn't even know this, so she said, "What else could it be? Don't you just like to be liked, envied, and praised by others."

"Totally correct." Ning Youguang agreed with her answer very much, "Then do you know what is the deep-seated reason behind this behavior?"

Xiaotian thought for a while and said, "I like this kind of life very much."

Ning Youguang smiled, "You can say that."

Xiaotian asked back, "Then what do you think?"

"The deep-seated reasons are written in their photos and words." Ning Youguang said. "Everywhere they say, 'I'm going to prove myself to myself, to prove that I'm worthy of this life, this house, this job and this love, to prove that I'm worthy, that I'm loved, that I'm meaningful'."

This is also the saddest reason.

People often love to show off what they lack.

The life posted on social networks is getting better and better, and the distance from reality is getting bigger and bigger, and our hearts are getting more and more disappointed, anxious, empty and divided.

Psychological research has found that the use of social networks reduces human happiness, not because "I feel that others are happier than me", but when we compare happiness with others, we feel that we are not so happy!

Xiaotian fell silent.

Ning Youguang continued, "Behind this proof, there is also a sense of presence. Why would a person use a sense of presence? It is because their inner sense of value is insufficient."

"Insufficient sense of intrinsic value?" Xiaotian asked, "Why is this?"

"Because they were often neglected, suppressed, or compared with other children's children by their parents or caregivers in childhood, so that their sense of existence could not be satisfied normally." Ning Youguang said, "especially Some people were compared and suppressed when they were young, and they would think that they were poor so they were not liked by others, but showing off can prove that they are good, so that they can be liked by others.”

"Presence is what everyone needs, but it manifests itself in different ways for everyone:

Some people will prove their importance by helping others, some people will prove that they are better than others by belittling others, some people will prove their worth by surpassing others, there is only one goal behind all these behaviors, That is to let more people 'see themselves'. For this 'seeing', they go to great lengths to show off their wealth, buy famous brands, and climb to a higher level.... making themselves physically and mentally compatible. "

In fact, the real psychological reason for showing off wealth is that her nurturers and important people in her life owe her attention.

She was ignored.

Maybe many people will feel hateful and disgusted when they see this kind of person, but as a psychological worker, in Ning Youguang's heart, her feelings for Xiaotian are one of understanding and distress.

If a person can truly realize his own value in his heart, he will not show off his wealth.

In fact, they did all this to prove that:

"I am important and I am worthy of love."

"Don't ignore me."

...

A girl's suppressed cry came from the quiet office.

Ning Youguang got up, went to the cabinet, took out a pack of napkins, and put them quietly on Xiaotian's legs, and then she didn't do anything.

When Xiaotian changed from suppressed crying to wailing and then to intermittent crying, which lasted for more than ten minutes, Ning Youguang waited quietly.

After crying, Xiaotian covered her face and pulled out a napkin to wipe her face. She had already taken off her black sunglasses.

After all, she is an Internet celebrity, her makeup skills are very good, her makeup is exquisite and waterproof.

She has been crying for so long, and her face is not too ugly.

However, even with thick makeup, Ning Youguang could see her thick dark circles in her eyes which were not covered by sunglasses.

And her sunken cheeks.

She suddenly discovered that this girl's foundation is actually very good.

It was said on the Internet that she had plastic surgery, she looked carefully and found that her nose was indeed augmented, her chin was padded, and the corners of her eyes were opened, but apart from the plastic surgery, she could see that her original face was also very delicate.

The facial features are smooth and delicate, and she is also a little beauty if she is not neat.

After the adjustment, it is a little less elegant, and a little more tacky and plastic.

It's a bit of a loss.

When Ning Youguang quietly observed Xiaotian, Xiaotian's mood gradually stabilized.

"Mr. Ning, I think what you said is right. The reason why I have such a strong pursuit of material things is that my family has a great influence on me. My family conditions are average. When I was young, my parents hardly gave me pocket money, and I wore clothes that were too expensive. I'm sorry, my mother was still sick during my high school years, and my family was even more difficult. One year during Chinese New Year, my parents had no money to buy me new clothes, so they brought a bunch of my cousin's old clothes for me to wear. , I was wearing her old clothes to school, and I felt very ashamed, but I was too embarrassed to tell my classmates that I didn’t buy new clothes for the New Year, so I chose two newer ones from my cousin’s old clothes to wear to school. I went to school and told my classmates that this is my new clothes for Chinese New Year, but my classmate said that the clothes looked old at first glance. Bags, shopping and shopping..." She said, "You know what? I especially like to wear newly bought famous brands and dress up to meet my classmates in high school, because I think it will make me feel better in the future. The stigma of high school was wiped away."

"I can understand." Ning Youguang said, "I think it's normal for this kind of mentality to appear, and many people have this stage."

Xiaotian said again, "Yes, and also, my parents have always thought that I am inferior to others, and they like double standards. No matter what I do, it is bad, and what I say is wrong, but outsiders do whatever they want. They are all right, and everything they say makes sense. Since they like others so much, why don’t they become other people’s parents? Why did they give birth to me? Now that I am like this, they like to go around telling others that I am no All right."

She laughed at herself, "I'm meaningless, anyway, I think they caused me to be like this today. Since I'm not happy, then everyone should stop trying to be happy."

After listening to her words, Ning Youguang said softly, "All human behaviors are for the pursuit of happiness. After all, happiness is a feeling that belongs to our hearts. It cannot be analyzed rationally or explained scientifically. , let alone compare. To obtain happiness, there are two core elements, either satisfying desires or stopping desires, we have to choose one of the two.” 1314