Article 343

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Mo Ran's voice was a little hoarse.

He still had something to say, but he didn't want to say it. He felt that he had no face to continue talking about it in front of Chu Wanning. How could he be cruel enough to let Chu Wanning know what happened in the past five years?

He... sometimes stayed alone in the snow valley, unable to distinguish the time or where he was. At that time, I pricked myself with needles, one needle after another, in the bones of my fingers. It was very painful. When the pain was enough, I knew that my consciousness was still awake and that I was still alive in this world.

Knowing that all this is not a big dream he had in his previous life, when he wakes up, he will not see the peak of life and death where things are different, Xue Meng is full of hatred, the Rufeng Sect has been razed to the ground, and he will not see the Red Lotus Waterside Pavilion. Chu night rather lay down with his clothes on, as if he was alive.

Just like before I was alive, just like before I was alive.

What other four words can be more painful than this?

Strangely enough, when he knew that Chu Wanning died to save him, and when he went down to the ghost world to save people, although his heart ached, he never felt so uncontrollably desperate.

But as life goes by, time gradually passes.

As Chu nightning wakes up day by day, the ink burns more and more painful, and his heart feels more and more like a knife.

It seems that the years of being alone have given him more time to think, and it seems that it is because he was so hysterical in the days without Chu Wanning, trying his best to imitate that person, wishing he could tear himself apart. Yes, replaced by Chu Wanning’s reflection.

In short, many things that he had not paid attention to, did not think deeply about, and gradually forgotten, all came back to his mind. Those past events were like the moist tidal flats exposed after the tide receded. He stood alone on the beach, and the waves had extinguished.

Everything is seen so clearly.

He thought of his past life, when wars were raging and there was no end of the road.

Xue Meng came to the top of life and death. In the Wushan Palace, which had changed beyond recognition, Xue Meng once questioned him word by word with tears in his eyes.

Why do you do this to your master?

Xue Meng once forced him, forcing him to look back before he died——

He said, the ink burned.

Think about it carefully and put down your ferocious hatred. You look back.

He once took you to practice martial arts and protected you.

He once taught you calligraphy, reading, writing poems and painting.

He once learned to cook for you, but he was so clumsy that his hands were injured.

He used to...he used to wait for you to come back day and night, alone from dusk...to dawn...

At that time, Mo Ran did not listen and refused to see.

Now he reached the shore of destiny and retreated. He lowered his head and looked at his feet, and saw a lost heart. That heart used to be so kind to him, and it was so sincere that it was about to die, and it was about to boil away all the hard work.

It was because of his stubbornness that he didn't see it and stepped on it under his feet.

He just stepped on Chu Wanning's heart under his feet!

Every time Mo Ran thinks about this, he feels cold all over his body and his flesh and blood are blurred. What has he done... what has he done? In two lifetimes and sixteen years, has he ever repaid Chu Wanning one day? How did he ever have the day when he put Chu Wanning first in his heart? !

brute! ! !

Could it be that I used to have a heart of wood and stone, so why doesn't it hurt? !

In the past five years, how many times have I seen Chu Wanning returning in white clothes in my sleep, with the same appearance as before.

When he woke up, the pillow was wet. He said every day, Chu Wanning, Master, I'm sorry, it's my fault, it's my fault.

I say it every day, but it doesn't make me feel any less guilty.

Later, when he saw Fang Fei in spring, he would think of him, and when he saw the falling snow in winter, he would also think of him.

Later, every morning was golden, just like Chu Wanning's soul. Every night is black, just like Chu Wanning's eyes. Later, every ray of bright moonlight was like the snow on his sleeves of clouds, and every rising sun was like the warmth hidden in his eyes. Later, he was in the red clouds of the sky, in the blue crab-colored morning light, and in the heroic sea of ​​clouds. Seeing Chu Wanning's figure.

He is everywhere.

Because of such pain and longing, he even gradually faded away from his hatred for his humble background and his almost fanatical love for his teacher.

One day, he saw a snow-covered spring flower poking out from a crack in the wall outside the snow valley.

He looked at it calmly for a while, just thinking as usual. He thought, ah, this flower is so beautiful, if the master sees it, he will definitely like it.

Just thinking about it lightly, thinking about the simplest and most casual little thing.

When those Chu nightnings died, they did not drive him crazy. The sadness that crushed him roared towards him in an instant. The embankment of thousands of miles was destroyed by ants, and he suddenly collapsed.

He burst into tears, the deep valley was dim, and the wild geese were frightened. His voice was so hoarse and ugly, and he was ashamed to cry for that golden flower that grew proudly from the snow.

Five years.

He never forgave himself.

"Master...I'm sorry...I tried my best to come back today, and I also brought you a gift. When I want to see you, I will not be empty-handed..." The calmness that was maintained by those strong forces was finally wiped out, and those old stories were wiped out. The calmness he had maintained finally fell apart.

The ink burned and knelt in front of Chu Wanning, and he finally got into trouble. Now, only in front of Chu Wanning, he will get into trouble.

"I... am still very stupid. After you are resurrected, I promise you

The first thing was not done. It is my fault. "

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